Are you wondering how to deal with a narcissist boyfriend?

Narcissism is a personality trait and most of us have some degree of it.

This can be a good thing because focusing on what is best for ourselves helps with confidence and resilience according to research.

However, as with everything in life, too much narcissism can be a problem, because it can lead to difficult relationships with others.

There are two different situations when we talk about dealing with a narcissist boyfriend.

Our boyfriend could have a little too much narcissism in his personality or he could have a narcissistic personality disorder.

The more narcissism, the more difficult it will be to establish a fulfilling relationship with him.

Does your boyfriend shower you with attention one day, gaslight you the next, and treat you coldly on other days?

Would you say the pattern keeps repeating itself every now and then? 

If yes, chances are that you are dating a narcissist boyfriend. 

According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition, DSM-5 a narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is defined by pervasive patterns of grandiosity, need for admiration, and lack of empathy.

Let’s take a closer look at 5 signs of a narcissist boyfriend.

Traits of a Narcissist Boyfriend

Your narcissist boyfriend may exhibit any or all of the following in varying degrees.

Grandiose Sense of Self Importance

Your boyfriend may have a Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) if he has an excessive interest in his success and talents.

As a result, his sense of self-importance may make him think you are jealous of his achievements.

In fact, he may even think that you are incapable of succeeding without him. 

In addition, your narcissist boyfriend may expect you to adore him and make him feel special.

Consequently, he might not be able to put your needs first because of his inflated ego. 

Lack of Empathy

An empathetic person is one who is capable of seeing things from other people’s perception.

However, people with NPD do not have empathy. With that in mind, the ability of your boyfriend to put himself in your shoes and understand how you feel is limited.

Consequently, your boyfriend may not show interest in your thoughts, feelings, or overall well-being.

In fact, he is likely to become intolerant of your feelings, and even flee or withdraw if he realizes you are too needy. 

In other words, your boyfriend is incapable of validating, listening, or even showing you support and understanding. In addition, he will not feel guilty or show remorse when he hurts you.

Sense of Entitlement

Since your boyfriend considers himself special and superior, he may have unreasonable expectations of demanding extreme loyalty, or preferential treatment.

In other words, he may want you to instantly fulfill his needs, failure to which he’s likely to become enraged. 

According to your narcissist boyfriend, the world revolves around him.

Consequently, he expects to always have his way because he thinks he’s better than everyone else. 

Arrogance

Arrogance is another trait that your narcissist boyfriend is likely to exhibit.

He may consider himself better than you, or other people.

In addition, his elevated sense of self may make him look down on you so he can feel good about himself. 

In other words, your boyfriend may exhibit know-it-all behaviors, and he may not even apologize for his mistakes.

Seeks Constant Admiration

Another sign that you’re dating a narcissist boyfriend is his tendency to demand attention all the time.

In addition, narcissists expect to receive compliments from others even when the compliments are unnecessary. 

He may constantly want you to put him on a pedestal.

In fact, criticism and lack of attention can make him burst out in anger. His need for admiration and the rage are a sign of low self-esteem. 

5 Tips on How to Deal with a Narcissist Boyfriend

Dating a narcissist boyfriend can be frustrating, irritating, and disheartening.

You may not know how to handle your boyfriend’s excessive demands, attention seeking, or constant blame. 

1 – Avoid Arguing

Your boyfriend may argue because he wants to prove he is right.

In addition, narcissists tend to feel superior when they win arguments.

That said, the best way to deal with a narcissist boyfriend is to avoid arguing when he starts blaming you. 

In addition, avoiding arguments helps to ensure you aren’t giving him reasons to belittle you. 

In other words, if he’s unwilling to take responsibility for his mistakes, just ignore him.

2 – Share Your Thoughts and Feelings

Tell your boyfriend how proud you are of his accomplishments.

Narcissists love to be praised. However also share when he hurts your feelings.

Sharing the positive and the negative aspects of his behavior may help him developing some empathy.

3 – Set Clear Boundaries and Adhere to Them

Narcissists assume their needs are more important than your needs. 

Therefore, your boyfriend may expect you to stop whatever you are doing so you can attend to his demands.

In addition, he may invade your personal space, time, and take control of your life. 

Therefore, another way to deal with your narcissist boyfriend is to establish clear boundaries from the get go.

You need to stipulate what your man can do, and what he cannot do including playing the blame game. 

In other words, it is important that you let him know unacceptable behaviors, and the consequences for violating those limits. 

4 – Seek Support

Building your support network is another way to deal with a narcissist boyfriend.

That said, you can confide in your trusted friends, family, and colleagues.

Sharing your story with significant others can help you gain insights on the best possible action if he is unable to control his behavior. 

Talking to others will help you gain perspective into the relationship and your feelings.

5 – Know When to Walk Away

Are you dealing with a severe case of narcissistic personality disorder?

If yes, the healthiest way to deal with a narcissist boyfriend is to leave the relationship.

It is important to remember your boyfriend did not know how to relate with others even before you met him. 

Therefore, it is hard to change his behavior.

In addition, it is important for you to consider whether staying with him is more rewarding than your peace of mind.

Taking time away to recharge can protect you from pain and emotional abuse.  

I hope you got some ideas of how to deal with a narcissist boyfriend.

Which strategy will you try first?

Let me know in the comments below.