Have you been feeling stressed, overwhelmed, and unhappy?
It may be time to make some difficult decisions that may lead to positive changes in your life.
Decisions may be difficult because we are:
- unable to choose one option
- scared that things could get worse
- uncertain of the outcome
- used to our current situation
In our journey to live a happy and fulfilling life, we are confronted with many difficult decisions.
There are so many options. How to decide what course of action will lead to happiness?
Is it time to:
- Look for a new job
- Start a business
- End or begin a relationship
- Move to a different place
- Change careers
- Prioritize differently
- Handle a difficult problem
- Weigh the pros and cons of a situation
- Plan for the future
“It’s not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.”
Roy E. Disney
Strategies to Make Difficult Decisions
1 – Look at the Big Picture
If you consider everything that is involved in the situation, what course of action seems best?
Consider the overall situation.
Many times we are stuck in a job, relationship, or situation but are unable to make a change.
We overthink our options, seek other people’s advice, and make lists of the pros and cons but how should we proceed?
General questions to clarify your options when making difficult decisions
- What idea keeps coming up?
- How do you feel about the different options?
- Are you comfortable in your current situation most of the time?
- Are you facing adversity at your current situation?
- How did you feel about this situation in the past?
- Is there a step you could take right now toward the change?
- Take a step toward the change. How do you feel after taking it?
- Are you trying to impress others?
- Is this the right time for the change?
- How successful were your previous decisions?
- How did you make your most successful decisions in the past?
If you found these questions useful you may learn more about yourself and Discover Yourself by Answering these Powerful Questions.
It is in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped.
Tony Robbins
2 – Write it Down
Writing all your ideas down on paper helps you better understand your options when making difficult decisions.
Get started by writing all your ideas on a piece of paper or screen. Don’t worry about grammar or spelling, just write down all your thoughts.
You will immediately feel relieved because your mind will quiet down.
Take a deep breath and trust that you will make the right decision for yourself.
Every day write about the decision you are pondering.
Weigh your options and how they make you feel.
Furthermore, when your mind is going in circles, thinking over and over the same situation, get some paper and write it down. You will be surprised at how much clarification you get from taking notes of your thoughts.
Here are some tips on How to Use Writing as a Superpower to Change Your Life.
Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
3 – Give Yourself Time
If you want to feel happy during the decision making process give yourself time.
It is crucial to explore the different options, write down your thoughts, and envision the small steps you will have to take toward the future you are trying to build.
As Eric Wargo states in The Mechanics of Choice, planning for retirement or what treatment to choose for a disease will involve balancing the short-term gratification against long-term benefits.
To avoid procrastination, set a deadline a few weeks into the future.
In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.
Theodore Roosevelt
4 – Ask Specific Questions
Some people like talking about their options to friends and family.
Occasionally, talking to a trusted person may shed some light about how to make a good decision.
However, in my experience as I explain my confusion to others, they can’t help but give me advice or what they would do in my situation. Having all that extra information is not always helpful because you may end up more confused than before.
On the other hand, asking questions to people who are already where we would like to be, may provide insightful information. Don’t ask them if they are happy or not because their definition of happiness may look different from yours. Ask them about aspects of life that are important to you.
For example if you are trying to make the difficult decision of starting your own business you may find it helpful to connect with business owners in your same niche. Questions such as:
- How long did it take you to start making a profit?
- What keeps you motivated?
- How many people work for you or help you?
- What do you dislike the most about your work?
- If you would start all over again, what would you change?
- How many hours per day do you work?
You can also find many answer to these questions by searching online.
Keep your temper. A decision made in anger is never sound.
Ford Frick
5 – Set a Deadline
When making difficult decisions it is helpful to set a date on the calendar.
Push yourself to make the most appropriate decision in a couple of weeks.
You may also decide that you don’t have enough information to make a decision at that time and decide to postpone the date until you collect the missing information.
You are where you are right now because of the decisions you have made before. Instead of rushing head over heels into what everyone else is doing or choosing, take time to decide what will make you happy.
Never make your most important decisions when you are in your worst moods. Wait. Be patient. The storm will pass. The spring will come.
Robert H. Schuller
What difficult decisions are you trying to make?
Let me know in the comments below.
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Sometimes making these big decisions can be scary! My husband and I have had to make a few lately, and looking at the big picture is so important, especially when it comes to career changes.
I love these tips. I try to write everything down and put down dates I want to accomplish things by each week.
You have noted down the points with such clarity. I appreciate your posting this helpful article. Thank you so much.
I can’t even count how many times I’ve struggled with making big decisions. I find that writing things down is incredibly helpful. Thanks for sharing these great tips!
This is something we all deal with. It’s hard but I think you’ve given some great advice!
Making any sort of difficult decision has never been a strength of mine. Weighing out the possibilities of what could happen in each scenario definitely helped me.
Life will definitely throw you all sorts of things that you will have to decide about. It can definitely be tough to sort through it all but this is some great advice.
These are all great tips. I agree we should always take our time when making a difficult decision.
This is wonderful advice. Making big decisions or big changes can be super scary!
These are great tips when facing important life decisions. I needed this today, thank you for sharing!
Making decision in life is totally difficult. Thanks for sharing your experience as this is needed by the people.
We all struggle with making big difficult decisions. It range from very simple one as choosing what to eat for dinner to what to major in college. And yes your right, weighing the advantages and disadvantages of an action helps a lot.
Making big decision could be pretty scary. When it comes to big decision making, I like discussing it with my spouse before moving on the next step. Thanks for sharing these tips!
It always helps me to think of the future. I like the idea of planning ahead. It definitely helps with stress.
A writeup like this opens new ways of thinking for us. Keep doing amazing work. Love all the tips and sharing this article with my friends
We really do need time to process. Big decisions shouldn’t be made in haste.
While all these tips are wonderful, and can be helpful, sometimes a person just has to go with their gut reaction. Often times we intuitively know what needs to be done, but fear is what really stops us from action. Still, writing it down and weighing out pros and cons as you suggested here can sometimes be what we need to prove to us our gut reaction was the right one
Most of the time our intuition is right but our mind keeps telling us that we need more information to make the right decision for ourselves.
This is a great, concise list. I need to keep more of these in mind, so it was great to read through this list you’ve put together. Thanks for sharing!
I’m glad you found the list useful.
Sometimes taking important decision is really scary to me. Thanks for your great blog. I am sure this will definitely help me.
Decisions can be scary because we are never certain about the outcome.
Agree with your tips and some sort of guidelines. Thinking of the big picture is a must and of course considering many things that may affect in taking such decision.
I have to keep reminding myself about keeping the big picture in mind.
Taking time to decide on big decisions to me is the best way. I never just say yes or no but do think about it first.
Cynthia,
Excellent point! Taking some time to think before making big decisions is very important.
Writing helped me a lot. I write down pros, cons or anything involved before I make a decision.
Definitely, need to prioritize how you make decisions. So that you can get the most bang out of your decisions.
You highlight some amazing strategies here. My favourite is to write it down. So often I get focused on the what if’s, I loose sight on what the real situation is. Writing it down certainly can help!
I also like to write it down to think more clearly about the different alternatives.